I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

  • I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed – dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce. — At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.


About the Author:

Is so wonderful to see how the love of Christ could bring healing to the lost. A simple blog article, a Tweet, a simple post on other social networks could make someone smile. Social media is a powerful tool, the more we share, the more that our Lord is Glorified. Online Evangelism, Social media Servant dedicated to spread the good news to the lost.

  • Random_acct

    Terrific story. Thanks. Marriage is very hard, but gives us Christians the best chance to show that we have been transformed by Christ to show His love. A love that forgives and is selfless.

  • painstick

    So the wife in this story was fighting cancer with weight-loss being the only side-effect? Curious. It’s a nice sentiment to suggest adulterers should reconsider their actions, but anyone who could be so oblivious to the plight of their spouse is clearly stupid. The moral of the story is: if you don’t want to be the downtrodden spouse then don’t marry someone who is emotionally unintelligent.

    • http://GoingAfterOne.com/ Rigo Campos

      @aec52862f571c14e450e4c839232ad66:disqus thanks for sharing your thoughs. God bless :D

  • jeanette H Fonseca

    Wow, what a wonderful story full of God’s love and the true meaning of uncoditional love. And most importatn FAITH.

    • http://chr1stl1ke.wordpress.com chr1stl1ke

      @Jeanete: God bless your heart and soul sister. Stay bless

  • http://www.alifeinchrist.com KarlDRhoads

    So, is this what happened in YOUR life or simply an illustration?

  • http://decyclemylife.wordpress.com Lady T

    I like the story but it makes me wonder why a woman had to be broken before a man appreciates her. Is that even true love? It sounds more like pity or guilt. I don’t have cancer but I am in a broken marriage. Adultery was the sledge hammer. Suddenly when I found out, the married mistress disappeared and my husband suddenly remembered that he loved me. One thing I do love about the story is that the husband chose to end the affair. It was a purposeful choice and not by default, like mine.

    • http://chr1stl1ke.wordpress.com chr1stl1ke

      Yeah I see what you mean. I also think and wonder the same way. Many of us don’t realize what we have until it’s gone. Sadly but true. This is the reason that we need to comfort and pray for each other. Maybe I don’t see my mistakes because I have walked away from the Lord, but our brothers an sisters in Christ need to be there to make us snap out of it and realize what we are doing wrong….
      Did you give your husband a chance after the adultery happen? Did you forgave him as Christ forgave our sins?

      • http://decyclemylife.wordpress.com Lady T

        God bless you. You’re very humble. Yes I did forgive him. Took a lot of effort since it was twice in less than a year. But he refused to go to counseling so I put him out. We love each other and he’s a good person. He likes women too much and doesn’t love me enough. It is what it is.

        • http://chr1stl1ke.wordpress.com chr1stl1ke

          Will keep you in prayer sister so God could gives you patience and strength during this time of healing. Just remember that what you are going thru is only going to make you stronger and will get you closer to our Lord so be thankful and praise His glorious name in Jesus name!

  • H.I.S. W.I.F.E.

    This was a hard read at first coming from a woman going through the initial stages of a divorce; however, to see you renew that love you had for your wife was absolutely beautiful. Marriage is not honored anymore and sometimes we have to be reminded of that young, carefree love we used to possess. Although your wife may have had other intentions for drafting her conditions, you were able to find that love again. And she was able to have a calm;a peace before she departed.

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